If you have to ask you'll never know ! [L.Armstrong]... thats Louis not Lance.

Dec 4, 2009

Oh Christmas Tree!

Christmas is coming. The geese are getting fat. Ok not geese. Broilers. The trees are getting taller. In the building compound.
Our Christmas tree hasn’t grown an inch from its inception. Because it’s plastic. The successor of a tree that had wire branches and tinsel leaves. But on the fakeness scale was right up there with Pamela Anderson’s twins. The plastic tree looks more real. The fall of the leaves more natural. On the scale, Katie Price aka Jordan. It’s retrieved from it’s box on the loft. Held under the tap to wash of a years accumulated dust. Left out to dry. The pot that holds the dead ficus is commissioned. The dead ficus dumped. The interlocking base of the tree is jammed into the pot and covered up with mud. Which is then covered up with cotton pretending to be snow. The box labeled Xmas tree decorations is opened. To pour forth a cornucopia of colored balls, the Ashtavinayak Santas. On a sleigh. In a rocking chair. Sliding down a chimney top. Bell in hand. Posing for passport picture. The angels. Big and small. Fat cherubs cheek by jowl with the Gold’s gym type. A group of them playing harps and lyres. Thermocole candles. Little presents wrapped in pretty paper. Fake chocolates with little hanging hooks. Rudolph the red nosed reindeer with a cellotaped tail. Even a miniature Christmas tree. Strands of tinsel in gold and silver which thanks to the passage of time had all faded into a matching indeterminate bronze. Candy canes and holly wreaths. The pine cones that had been brought back from a long ago holiday in Kashmir. Some painted silver and some au natural. Stars in all shapes and sizes. Big giants and little dwarfs. With one in silver that fits right at the top of the tree. The old set of lights is kept back in the box. The new Made in China lights will light up the tree this year.
And after the ornaments have been hung and the tinsel cascaded down in uniform folds with a uniform distribution of lights more snow falls on the tree . While the temperature outside is still in the upper twenties. After all the Non Sterile cotton from Bandra Medical stores is exhausted it’s ready. Ready for Christmas eve when after, we’re all at midnight mass Santa will find his way here Guided by the twinkling lights. So that when we return the same twinkling lights and our Christmas punch tainted vision make our tree the best Christmas tree in the world.


Pooja said...

True to every Bandra home! You're a brilliant writer!

agent green glass said...

ooh so nice.

Girish Shahane said...

Such a pleasure to read. Glad you're posting again.

The Cloudcutter said...

The last line is the best... makes me feel like a kid all over again.

clemde@gmail.com said...

Pooja AGG, Girish and CC thank you. Praise coming from other writers is the best kind.
Pooja authored a childrens book.An angel and a Half
AGG writes a blog with some great stories in it. Dig deep.
Girish acclaimed journalist.
CC . also a journalist blogger and poet.

Floyd said...

I am overdosing right now, everyday a new post. Come January, Clement please do'nt stop.

Anonymous said...

The cotton snow :) Good times!
Now you get fake snow in a can at the Made-in-China stores!

clemde@gmail.com said...

: Floyd. Giles tells me you'll are here on the 20th.Looking forward to finally meeting you. Going to ask Kim to sing too but this is normallya a very hectic time for him.
Anonymous: Everything seems to made in china they've even modified that old phrase " marriages are made in heaven" .

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