If you have to ask you'll never know ! [L.Armstrong]... thats Louis not Lance.

Dec 5, 2011

Pride and Prejudice

Jo-boy has come back from kindergarten to tell mummy that his bench partner is Ravi.
What ! A Hindu?
No mummy he's a D'souza. A sigh of relief. If even your bench partner is non catholic his worshipping of heathen gods will imperil your up coming first communion ?

Standard Three and it's also a Ravi but this time Gaitonde. Not so bad he's a Hindu fellow but a Goan. Thank god for small mercies. Auntie Dolcie has displaced Barrack Obama's election from the family news. She wants to marry. Marry outside the community. Granny is searching her soul. Searching for where she went wrong with Dolcie. Did that fall from the mango tree cause permanent damage when Dolcie was five? Why , then why does she want to marry a Mangalorean? They're are just like Hindus. Their women wear sarees not dresses. Their names are Vivek and Anil. Their food is idlis pretending to be Sannas . Their men are better at business than the Sindhis. That's the silver lining on the cloud. At least Dolcie won't starve.

Dolcie changes into a red saree halfway thru the reception and were told it's tradition. This makes grandpa see red. But they're serving scotch so he's okay.
Dolcie's expecting her first baby when cousin Jerry announces that he's getting married. Yippee do da yeah. Party time here we come. Visions of fugias are dancing in our heads. Only to be told that the bride wants the Arya Samaj rite.
Arya what?
She's Hindi ?
No Mummy Hindi is a language. She's Hindu.
If I die now it will be your fault.
You won't die mummy and she'd like the women to wear sarees for the wedding.
What does she think we are? Mangloreans?

Dolcies son is born.
Chris ?
No mom Kris. It's like Chris with a K.
Don't call me mom you're not an American.
She doesn't know about a certain Hindu Gopi loving butter stealing blue blooded god and is thus spared a cardial infraction.
Kris goes to kindergarten. His bench partner is Pablo, who's French parents are working with an NGO in Khetwadi.
Kris travels the world. Comes back to Bandra. Invites his parents to his wedding where he and Sam will pledge their undying love for each other under the mango tree in the garden.

Thank god your grandmothers not alive to see this, she would have died of a heart attack.